dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Holy sore nipples Batman
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
