Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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