Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it penis luge time yet?
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize