You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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