I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
