i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
