You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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