dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
