i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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