it wasn't lemon gatorade
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Blood and glitter go together right?
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
You're a waste of cheezeits
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
