We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
It's shark week go big or go home
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
