Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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