Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize