Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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