im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
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