i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Randomize
