I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Randomize
