Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
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