and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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