There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
