So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
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