I just cut my nipple shaving
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
high people should be assigned attendants
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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