Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
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