She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I had to cum in my sink.
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