OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Randomize
