I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Someone signed my nipple.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
