You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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