Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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