when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize