Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
