READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
