Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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