glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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