I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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