toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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