Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
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