you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
ugly people sure do ruin things
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize
