No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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