dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
