Swine flu. Run for my life!
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
