your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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