She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
