youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
