I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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