she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize