Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
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the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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