What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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