Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
