so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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