Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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