I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
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