We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
