okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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